Men vs Me

Relationships after relationships and we wonder why we still haven't been able to find a suitable partner who can complement or compromise with us. Well, I can't remember exactly how many of these relationships I've been in and out of but I can safely say, I've encountered and experience enough to know that "AFTER ALL THAT, HIGH POSSIBILITY IS YOU STILL HAVEN'T FOUND YOUR PERSON". And we wonder why, I'm sure. Why after 10 years of being together, we still come to an end? Why is it that my partner doesn't do the same for me when I'm putting relentless effort in the relationship? Haha, this post is not going to give you that answer. I'm just going to share a few key pointers I live by.

Things I keep in mind:

1. Don't be too quick to judge.

2. Give them a considerable amount of time to learn to compromise. Note that you haven't been around enough for them to know what you want or need.

3. Ideally, we would want them to read our minds. But, sadly, they are no psychics. So, tell him/her what you want/need. If your partner loves you, he/she will go out of their way to make you happy.

4. Don't waste too much time on someone who makes you feel sad, worthless, under-appreciated or taken for granted. Why be in a taxing relationship when you can be your own person? Making one person happy is way easier than making two people happy. Love is two-way. If you have to make both parties happy at your own expense, you're in the wrong relationship.

5. Let the past go. Stop being a jealous bitch. Most of the time, you're over-thinking. And over-thinking can sometimes attract the over-thought situation to happen. It's weird. The more you think it's true, the more it's prone to be true. Scary. So stop pondering and lingering on what has happened. The present is already a handful. Focus on the now.

6. If a guy is being nice to you when he's courting you, it doesn't mean he's going to be nice throughout. Test the waters. Find out what you're worth to him. If you think you deserve more, don't settle for less. Know your worth and don't bend over for someone. If he can't make you happy, someone else will.

7. Live by the old saying "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you". I'm not asking women to dismiss chivalry, but let's at least try to practice what we preach (men are hoomans too). However, please let your man open the door for you, if you've luckily met someone who still does. 

8. Very important: PUT ASIDE YOUR FUCKING EGO. Seriously. Only family will bend over to compromise with ego. Your partner, isn't.

9. If your partner ever leaves you, don't give up. Try again. If all else fails, pick up the broken pieces, walk away and try mending them on your own..

10. Don't even think of looking for a rebound to fix your heart for you. Chances are, your baggage would be too heavy a burden for your new partner to carry.

These are things I've learned over the years. If they've helped in clearing your head, I'm glad. If they didn't, then I'm sure I'd have many more things to learn from you.

Sincerely yours.

xx