Up, up, here we go.

Wow, how in the world does someone get themselves back on blogging after being so undisciplined for so long? What do I even talk about when I feel life is slow moving for me? I was talking to a friend today, and she talked about going back on blogging and here I am, after she successfully triggered the writer/heart-pourer in me. Is it that bad that I wear my heart on my sleeve? Someone not-so-wise has said this to me before; that wearing my heart on my sleeve allows people to laugh about the pain I feel while I sulk about it on my own. But does that really matter? That people know how bad I feel about life, or about myself? I never knew we were supposed to be discreet about the things that go on, especially when I've always been so open and honest about the things I do or go through.

So I haven't blogged in almost three months, if I'm not mistaken, and because I haven't been writing for so long, I've definitely lost touch. For someone who hasn't touched a book in years, I must suck real bad when it comes to my vocabulary. I'm not ashamed tho, as long as I get my message across I guess.

I'm left with a semester to go and I'll be done with my communications degree in RMIT. These two and a half years has surely passed fast. It's time I decide where I want to be and what I want to do in life. I've learned tho, that we don't really have to have all these things in life planned out from the beginning, or that we have to know exactly what we want to do. Take it as it comes, take it one step at a time. This is the advice I've lived by. Because I have a strong tendency to rush things or to try organise everything, only to come to an end which isn't even close to what I have planned out for me.

Enough about what life should be and back to what life has been these few months.

I got a surprise visit from an important person last month. It didn't turn out well. I loved him dearly, and I still care for him now but some things just don't turn out the way you wish it would. I've accepted our differences and the fact that we're not right for each other. I hope he did, too. Thank you any way, for coming over and treating us so well. Furby and I, we will always love your niceties. You don't get this a lot in life, so here I am appreciating every bit of it, and you.

I fell in love last month too. I don't know what sparked that or how it still exists now, but what I know is that this feeling has been indescribable since I started feeling it. I'm stuck in between lines right now, leaving me in an area so gray that I don't have the slightest idea where I'd be the next week, the next day or even the next minute. Why do I do this to myself you ask? Lol, I have no fucking idea. I'm just living by the same advice I got, taking it as it comes. Why dwell upon something when you know you're not going to get yourself answers? So this is what I'll be doing for awhile. Just embracing what I have now and anticipating what comes next. Be it life with or without him, I'm sure I'll find happiness somewhere, somehow.

Dinner's served.

Random update soon :)

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